Kev hais lus rau pej xeem nyuaj heev. Txawm hais tias koj tab tom kawm chav hais lus, muab lus tawm tswv yim rau ib tus phooj ywg thov kom toast, lossis lwm yam kev hais lus, kawm paub yuav ua li cas thiaj muaj tswv yim zoo tuaj yeem pab tus neeg hais lus kom nyob ntsiag to thiab ua kom qhov xwm txheej ua haujlwm tau zoo. Kawm kom mloog zoo thiab sau tseg qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws ntawm kev hais lus, tom qab ntawd tsom mus rau koj qhov kev thuam nrog kev txhawj xeeb tshaj plaws rau tus hais lus.
Kauj ruam
Ntu 1 ntawm 3: Kev Mloog Zoo
Kauj Ruam 1. Ua tib zoo mloog tus neeg hais lus
Koj tsis tuaj yeem tawm tswv yim rau ib tus neeg qhov kev hais lus tshwj tsis yog koj mloog. Zaum ntsiag to thiab mloog cov lus hais, txawm hais tias ntsuas kev hais lus hauv chav kawm, lossis pab ib tus neeg npaj rau kev hais lus pej xeem.
- Kaw tag nrho cov cuab yeej hluav taws xob thiab tshem tawm ib qho kev cuam tshuam. Saib tus neeg hais lus thaum hais lus. Koj yuav tsum tsis txhob tuav dab tsi tsuas yog tej zaum yog phau ntawv rau sau ntawv.
- Tsis txhob ntsuas kev hais lus raws li cov ntawv nkaus xwb. Hauv lwm lo lus, tsis txhob nyeem cov lus thiab tom qab ntawd tawm tswv yim. Nug tus neeg hais lus kom xa nws cov lus. Yog tias qee yam tsim los kom xa tawm, nws yuav tsum tau hnov kom nws tuaj yeem ntsuas tau zoo.
Kauj Ruam 2. Paub lub ntsiab lus tseem ceeb ntawm kev hais lus
Thawj qhov koj xav tshem ntawm koj cov lus yog lub tswv yim tseem ceeb nws tau sim nthuav tawm. Tshwj xeeb tshaj yog tias koj tab tom mloog cov lus hais ntxias, nws zoo tshaj los pib nrog thesis lossis lub tswv yim tseem ceeb uas tus hais lus tau sim ua pov thawj nrog nws cov lus. Nws yog tus hais lus txoj haujlwm los piav qhia lub tswv yim tseem ceeb yog li koj yuav tsum muaj peev xwm txheeb xyuas cov ntsiab lus tseem ceeb sai.
- Yog tias koj tsis tuaj yeem pom lub tswv yim tseem ceeb ntawm kev hais lus, sim thiab kwv yees qhov koj xav tias tus hais lus tau sim ua pov thawj. Sau nws cia. Thaum koj tom qab tshuaj xyuas qhov kev hais lus, qhov tsis meej yuav muaj txiaj ntsig zoo rau kev tawm tswv yim.
- Rau qee qhov kev hais lus, xws li toast, salute, lossis ua tsaug, lub tswv yim yuav meej, tab sis ua piv txwv tsis paub. Tus neeg hais lus puas tuaj yeem qhia nws lub tswv yim kom meej? Puas yog qhov yeeb yam nws tus kheej ua rau lub tswv yim meej dua? Tus neeg hais lus puas tuaj yeem ua ntau dua los ua lub ntsiab lus ntawm nws qhov kev hais lus meej?
Kauj Ruam 3. Sim ua raws tus neeg hais lus txhawb kev sib cav
Lub ntsiab lus tseem ceeb ntawm kev hais lus zoo li lub dav hlau ntawm lub rooj: nws tsis muaj txiaj ntsig tshwj tsis yog nws tau txhawb nqa los ntawm ob txhais ceg ntawm lub rooj. Yog li, lub tswv yim tseem ceeb ntawm kev hais lus yog txhawb los ntawm kev txhawb cov ntsiab lus, kev sib cav, kev xav thiab kev tshawb fawb. Tus neeg hais lus ua pov thawj li cas rau cov neeg mloog tias nws lub ntsiab lus tseem ceeb raug?
- Yog tias koj tab tom mloog cov lus hais ntxias, sim xav txog cov lus teb, cov lus nug, thiab kev tawm tsam uas koj yuav siv rau tom qab tawm tswv yim. Dab tsi tsis meej pem? Puas muaj cov ntsiab lus txhawb nqa uas tuaj yeem ua kom pom meej dua? Koj puas pom muaj qhov khoob ntawm nws qhov kev sib cav?
- Yog tias koj tab tom mloog cov lus hais tsis raws cai, xws li toast lossis hais lus zoo siab, tsom mus rau kev npaj cov ntaub ntawv uas koj tau txais. Nws puas tsim nyog? Nws puas tuaj yeem ua raws? Nws zoo li yuav dhia ib ncig?
Kauj Ruam 4. Qhib rau kev lees paub
Ntsuam xyuas kev hais lus nrog lub siab kaw yog txoj hauv kev tsis zoo. Txawm hais tias koj yuav hnov ib tus neeg hais lus hauv Lub Ntiaj Teb Zaum Zej Zos, ua koj qhov zoo tshaj plaws los mloog nrog lub hom phiaj lub siab, txaus siab mloog cov ntsiab lus thiab nthuav tawm ntawm ib tus neeg hais lus. Yog tias koj tsis pom zoo, yam koj tsis pom zoo nrog yog cov ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus. Hauv qhov xwm txheej ntawd koj yuav tsum tsis txhob tso cai rau koj qhov kev ntxub ntxaug ua qhov tseem ceeb.
Kauj Ruam 5. Sau ntawv
Txheeb xyuas cov ntsiab lus tseem ceeb thiab cov lus sib cav uas tus neeg hais lus tau sim xa thiab sau cia rau hauv ib daim ntawv teev npe. Koj tsis tas yuav ua tus qauv txheej txheem, tab sis nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb kom sau cov ntawv luv luv uas yuav muab cov ntaub ntawv rau kev tawm tswv yim tom qab. Ua tib zoo sau ntawv thiab koj qhov kev ntsuam xyuas yuav yooj yim dua.
Sau cov lus lossis lub sijhawm nco tshaj plaws los ntawm kev hais lus kom qhuas. Sau tseg txhua lub sijhawm tus neeg hais lus tau txais cov lus pom zoo lossis cov lus teb tsis zoo los ntawm cov neeg mloog
Ntu 2 ntawm 3: Ntsuam Xyuas Cov Lus Qhia Tshwj Xeeb
Kauj Ruam 1. Ntsuas cov ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus
Qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws ntawm kev hais lus tsis yog kev hais lus lossis kev nyiam ntawm tus hais lus, tab sis cov ntsiab lus raug xa tawm. Kev hais lus yog qhov nyuaj vim tias nws muaj txhua qhov kev cov nyom ntawm kev sau ib tsab ntawv, tab sis nrog qhov nyuaj ntxiv ntawm kev ua kom yooj yim hnov nrov nrov. Qhov tseem ceeb tshaj plaws hauv koj qhov kev ntsuam xyuas yog cov ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus. Yog tias kev hais lus yog kev hais lus ntxias, lossis hais lus sib cav, cov ntsiab lus feem ntau suav nrog kev tshawb fawb ntau, piv txwv ntawm lub ntiaj teb tiag, thiab cov ntsiab lus tseem ceeb. Hauv kev hais lus tsis raws cai, cov ntsiab lus feem ntau cuam tshuam nrog cov lus tsis txaus ntseeg, dab neeg, thiab kev tso dag. Thaum koj ntsuas, khaws cov lus nug hauv qab no hauv siab thiab teb lawv raws li txoj hauv kev los tawm tswv yim:
- Lub ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus yog dab tsi?
- Puas yog cov ntsiab lus meej thiab hais tau zoo?
- Puas yog kev sib cav txhawb los ntawm kev tshawb fawb? Piv txwv zoo?
- Puas yog cov ntsiab lus meej rau cov neeg mloog?
- Tus neeg hais lus puas ua pov thawj nws lub ntsiab lus?
Kauj Ruam 2. Ntsuas qhov chaw hais lus
Hauv kev siv zog los piav qhia cov ntsiab lus thiab ua kom yooj yim zom, kev hais lus yuav tsum tau ua kom zoo. Tsis raug cai lossis tsis raug cai, kev hais lus rau pej xeem yuav tsum yooj yim mloog. Yog hais lus hla lossis dhia ntawm taw tes rau taw tes zoo li kev ntaus pob tesniv, kev hais lus yuav xav tau rov kho dua. Txhawm rau pab koj ntsuas koj li kev hais lus, khaws cov lus nug hauv qab no hauv siab kom koj tuaj yeem tsim cov lus tawm tswv yim rau tus hais lus:
- Puas yog cov lus sib cav txhawb cov txheej txheem?
- Kev hais lus puas yooj yim ua raws? Nyuaj? Vim li cas?
- Puas yog tus neeg hais lus cov ntsiab lus ntws los ntawm ib kis mus rau lwm qhov?
- Dab tsi tuaj yeem suav nrog txhawm rau hais lus kom meej rau koj?
Kauj Ruam 3. Ntsuas cov lus hais
Thaum cov ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus hais txog qhov tau hais, hom kev hais lus hais txog txoj kev xa khoom. Kev hais lus zoo yuav tsum ua raws li cov ntsiab lus ntawm nws cov ntsiab lus: nws tsis zoo li daim ntawv hnyav ntawm cov neeg ntses taub ntswg ntev yuav koom nrog "paub koj cov neeg tuaj saib" kev ua si lossis cov neeg koom nrog. Cov style tau cuam tshuam los ntawm ntau npaum li cas tus neeg hais lus koom nrog cov neeg mloog, txawm hais tias tus neeg hais lus xaiv siv lus tso dag lossis tsis yog, thiab lwm yam ntsiab lus ntawm tus kheej hauv nws cov lus. Txoj kev hais lus tau sau yuav cuam tshuam rau tus yam ntxwv, nrog rau txoj kev xa nws mus. Puas muaj lus tso dag zoo li tso dag tiag? Puas yog kev tshawb fawb nthuav tawm kom raug thiab meej? Nco ntsoov cov lus nug hauv qab no:
- Koj yuav piav qhia txog hom kev hais lus thiab tus hais lus li cas?
- Puas yog hom lus ntawm kev hais lus txhawb cov ntsiab lus, lossis nws tsis sib haum? Vim li cas?
- Tus neeg hais lus txaus ntseeg npaum li cas?
- Kev hais lus tau npaj li cas? Nws puas yooj yim ua raws?
Kauj Ruam 4. Ntsuas lub suab ntawm qhov hais lus
Lub suab hais lus hais txog txhua yam cuam tshuam ntawm cov ntsiab lus thiab cov qauv. Lub suab hais lus yuav yog lub teeb, lossis hnyav, lossis so, thiab tsis muaj lub suab raug lossis tsis raug rau ib qho ntsiab lus. Qhia cov dab neeg thiab lus tso dag hauv kev hais lus yuav tsim nyog, lossis nws yuav ua rau muaj kev puas tsuaj. Qhia zaj dab neeg kov txog koj tus thawj coj ntawm kev so haujlwm yuav tsim nyog, tab sis nws yuav tsis tsim nyog yog tias nws txaj muag. Lub suab yuav tsum phim cov lus nws tus kheej thiab qhov xwm txheej.
- Leej twg yog cov neeg mloog rau kev hais lus? Lawv xav tau dab tsi ntawm kev hais lus thiab tus hais lus?
- Koj yuav piav qhia lub suab ntawm kev hais lus li cas?
- Lub suab ntawm kev hais lus puas haum cov ntsiab lus? Yuav ua li cas?
- Yog tsis yog, yuav kho lub suab li cas?
- Lub suab nrov zoo npaum li cas rau cov neeg mloog rau kev hais lus?
Ntu 3 ntawm 3: Muab Tswv Yim Tsim Kho
Kauj Ruam 1. Sau koj cov lus tawm tswv yim
Txawm hais tias lub sijhawm twg thiab vim li cas koj thiaj tawm tswv yim, rau tsev kawm ntawv lossis tsis raug cai, nws yog lub tswv yim zoo los sau cov lus thuam, kev qhuas, thiab lus pom, yog li tus neeg hais lus yuav muaj daim ntawv ntawm koj cov lus tawm tswv yim. Yog tias koj muab qee cov lus qhia, tus neeg hais lus yuav hnov qab lawv yooj yim, tshwj xeeb yog yog muab tam sim tom qab hais lus. Nws yog lub tswv yim zoo los sau ntawv luv, tsis pub ntau tshaj 250 lossis 300 lo lus, nrog rau kev tshuaj xyuas qhov kev hais lus.
Rau qee chav kawm hais lus, koj yuav tsum tau sau ib nqe los yog ntsuas tus hais lus. Ua raws cov lus qhia tshwj xeeb hauv chav kawm ntawm no thiab muab cov qhab nia raws li
Kauj Ruam 2. Sau cov lus hais raws li koj nkag siab
Pib kev tawm tswv yim nrog cov ntsiab lus ntawm yam koj tau kawm los ntawm kev hais lus yog txoj hauv kev zoo tshaj plaws los qhia rau tus neeg hais lus paub seb lawv tab tom sim qhia dab tsi tau raug sib tham kom raug lossis tsis yog. Tsis txhob txhawj xeeb txog tias koj cov ntsiab lus raug lossis tsis raug. Yog tias koj ua tib zoo mloog thiab tiag tiag sim ua raws, kev ua tsis tiav ntawm koj ib feem yuav tsum qhia rau tus hais lus. Qhov ua tsis tiav yog qee yam uas yuav tsum tau hais meej dua hauv kev hais lus.
- Sim pib koj cov lus teb nrog qee yam xws li, "Qhov kuv hnov koj hais yog …" lossis "Qhov kuv tau txais los ntawm cov lus no yog …"
- Cov ntsiab lus zoo yuav tsum suav nrog ob peb kab lus hauv kev tshuaj xyuas, tej zaum tsawg dua ib nrab ntawm cov lus tawm tswv yim. Txheeb xyuas cov tswv yim tseem ceeb thiab cov ntsiab lus tseem ceeb ntawm kev hais lus. Cov ntsiab lus yuav tsum tsom mus rau cov ntsiab lus nkaus xwb.
Kauj Ruam 3. Tsom koj cov lus tawm tswv yim feem ntau ntawm cov ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus
Tsis yog txhua tus tuaj yeem lossis yuav tsum zoo li Martin Luther King Jr. Kev tsom mus rau cov lus tawm tswv yim feem ntau ntawm tus neeg hais lus kev txawj hais lus feem ntau yuav tsis pab ntau, tshwj xeeb tshaj yog tias peb tab tom tham txog kev hais lus hauv chav kawm, kev hais lus tshoob kos, lossis qee yam kev nthuav qhia kev lag luam.
Yog tias tus neeg hais lus feem ntau tsis txaus ntseeg, tsom mus rau qhov yuav ua li cas cov ntsiab lus ntawm kev hais lus tuaj yeem ua tau zoo dua tus qauv ntawm kev xa khoom thiab yuav hloov lub suab li cas kom haum nws. Qhov no tuaj yeem hloov tag nrho. Qhia tus neeg hais lus kom "muaj zog dua" lossis "lom zem" tsis yog lub tswv yim zoo
Kauj Ruam 4. Nrhiav ib yam dab tsi los qhuas
Txawm hais tias koj tsuas yog saib koj tus phooj ywg zoo tshaj tawm tsam kom hais lus phem tshaj plaws ntawm tus nkauj nyab txhua lub sijhawm, koj tseem yuav tsum nrhiav qee yam zoo los hais. Pib koj qhov kev tawm tswv yim nrog ob peb qhov kev qhuas thiab muab koj qhov kev ntsuas los ntawm kev ntseeg siab. Ua txhua qhov kev tawm tswv yim raws li kev thuam thuam, tsis yog kev puas tsuaj. Pib tawm los ntawm kev hais tias nws zoo li txaus ntshai tiag tiag thaum nws tau hais lus, lossis yuav hais lus tiaj tus li cas tsuas yog ua rau lub ntsiab lus hnyav dua.
- Yog tias koj pom cov lus hais lus tsis txaus ntseeg, koj yuav xav kawm los hais qee yam xws li, "Qhov kev hais lus ntawd nyob ntsiag to, uas kuv xav tias zoo meej rau lub sijhawm."
- Yog tias tus neeg hais lus zoo li tsis txaus ntseeg, sim ua kom nws rov los nrog nws ob peb qhov kev qhuas, "Koj saib zoo li ntawd. Koj cov lus hais nws txhua yam rau koj tus kheej."
Kauj Ruam 5. Ua kom pom tseeb cov lus pom ntawm kev kho qhov hais lus
Siv cov lus tawm tswv yim los ua cov ntaub ntawv rau kev hloov pauv tshwj xeeb uas yuav txhim kho kev hais lus, tsis yog txhawm rau txheeb xyuas qhov ua tsis raug ntawm kev hais lus, lossis yam uas koj tsis zoo li tsis nkag siab. Qhov no yuav ua rau tus neeg hais lus tsim ib yam dab tsi thiab nws yuav sim kho nws, tsis yog rhuav nws.
Tsis txhob hais tias, "Kuv tsis nyiam koj qhov tso dag." Hais tias, "Lwm zaus, kuv xav tias koj tuaj yeem hnov qab cov lus tso dag thiab koj cov lus yuav ntws sai dua."
Kauj Ruam 6. Sim tsom mus rau tsis pub ntau tshaj peb qhov tseem ceeb ntawm kev txhim kho
Rhuav ib tus neeg nrog tsib caug yam sib txawv los kho thiab ua haujlwm tuaj yeem ua rau txoj haujlwm zoo li tsis muaj kev cia siab. Raws li tus ntsuas, nws yog ib qho tseem ceeb uas koj tsom mus rau peb qhov tseem ceeb ntawm kev txhim kho thiab tsis txhob txhawj ntau txog qib thib ob.
- Ua ntej tsom mus rau kho cov ntsiab lus, kev hais lus, thiab lub suab ntawm kev hais lus ua ntej koj tsom mus rau lwm yam. Cov no yog cov kho pawg tseem ceeb tshaj plaws, thiab yog txoj hauv kev zoo tshaj plaws los txhim kho kev hais lus sai. Xav txog txhua yam no raws li qhov kev txiav txim siab tshaj plaws ntawm kev mloog.
- Xav txog kev xa khoom tshwj xeeb lub sijhawm tom ntej. Lub sijhawm hais lus dag ntawm qhov kawg ntawm kev hais lus yuav tsum yog qhov kawg uas tus neeg hais lus txhawj xeeb txog. Yog tias kev hais lus twb zoo heev lawm, thov txuas ntxiv ntawm qhov teeb meem thib ob no.
Lub tswv yim
- Ib txwm pib thiab xaus koj qhov kev ntsuas nrog kev qhuas.
- Kev xa mus rau cov ntawv tuaj yeem ua tiav yog tias koj muab kev tshuaj xyuas lossis sau ntawv.
